People Are Who They Are!

Still Ranting

One of the things I really find difficult about writing here is deciding what to write about. How much of yourself should you let out here. I’ve been pretty forthright but I still hold a lot back. I think to myself, no one wants to hear about that part or no one wants to hear about that at all. It’s also difficult to admit just how many problems I have sometimes so I don’t necessarily do a complete tell all.

Living alone and being broke make for a boring life most of the time. I opted for this, the being alone part,  but it tends to make things difficult when you want something to write about. I have tons of stories from the past but who wants to dredge up the past all the time. I moved to another state to escape a lot of the past in the first place.

I’m a very emotional person. I’ve had a rough life. Some of it I had no control over, and some of it I brought on myself. There have been times that I’ve had a difficult time writing posts because I was crying so hard while I wrote them that I could barely see through the tears. Those emotions are a lot of what drive me to want to write, but who wants to read a bunch of sappy posts all the time.

I’m also quite funny to those who know me out here in the real world. I have a quick wit and a very dry sense of humor. I’m well liked, but I am known to be brutally honest. I’ve been called that. It takes too much effort to lie. You have to remember all those lies you tell and it’s easy to screw up. I’d rather be called brutally honest any day than to be called a liar. Besides, my mother always said she could look at my eyes and tell when I was telling a lie so I just always figured everyone else could too. I did figure out later in life that most people don’t pay enough attention to anything any more to notice that eye thing, but by the time I figured that out I was already in the habit of being brutally honest.

I’m a dreamer. I’m also OCD and ADD and all those D things that make most people think I’m a bit of a loon. Dysfunctional is definitely a good description of me if you were to compare me to most people. I’m old enough to not really care that much about what people think any more and in a position, being alone out here in the wilderness, to not have to worry about it. I set that up intentionally. I got tired of being judged all the time when every one that was judging me seemed to me to be in a lot worse shape than I was.

My kids are grown and both have severe drug problems and they are in their thirties now. Ridiculous for sure and I could definitely write daily on a blog about drug problems, but I don’t really want to write about all of that all the time. Again, I moved to get away from all of that.

I have an imagination, like I said, I’m a dreamer. But making up stories that are worth reading would take a whole lot of time. I check out the people I know on Facebook and they are posting ten and twenty times a day with things like what they had for breakfast and that they are on their way to the park with the kids. Tiny snippets of their lives all day every day. I have no interest in it so I have to wonder why anyone else would. Milestones, I can see posting about milestones in your life but not “Oh, I went to work this morning.” “I had cereal for breakfast.” For the love of God.

Yes, I know, I’m on a two day long rant now about this. I’m searching. Searching the files stacked high in my head. There is worthwhile stuff in there I know. I just need it to be meaningful somehow. Something worth actually taking the time to write or read. Time is precious and I don’t want to waste the precious time of people I call friends.

I’ll figure it out. I’m on a mission to do just that.



9 responses

  1. You ought to try your hand at the drabble thingys. 100 words on any subject. It gives you a creative outlet, something to write, and the length – once you get used to it – means it takes up not all that much time.

    Or just make a lot of crap up, lol. I do a fair amount of that. Maybe I’m not really married … maybe I’m not really even a guy …

    I don’t blog about “real” things – never mentioning specifics about my job, keeping away from MOST political or religious subjects – because I just do it to have fun. And, as you said, to get away from real life.

    July 6, 2012 at 1:44 pm

  2. You were there for me when I was changing careers. So I’m honored to be part of this. I think it’s brilliant that you’re making an effort to not bore your readers. God, do I wish more people would think of that before they posted! This is why I’m not on Twitter or Facebook. Wow, you just fed your dog? And he looked cute? Sheesh, so glad I postponed the laundry to read that! BLEH! LOL!

    One thing that hit me hard, Ladywise, was the realization that blogging turns us into writers. I mean really, this isn’t like email or letters, where you’re targeting a conversation for a friend or family member. This is writing. Like being a journalist. And it’s not something that comes naturally to me and sometimes it’s as stressful as real life. I think every time, am I funny? Am I entertaining? Do i sound like I’m bellyaching? Gosh, that sentence sucks. It can be mighty hard some days. But finding that authentic voice comes eventually, and I think with enough investment you’ll find your groove and you’ll get exactly the right audience.

    July 6, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    • Well, I am just honored to have you as a friend period. Thank you even more for that. And like you, I worry about the same things, being funny, or entertaining. And like I’ve said in the posts, I have done my share of bellyaching here and I don’t want to do that. Not all the time anyway. I would like to find my stride as a writer. I’ve tried my hand at it a lot over the years and you are so right. This is a great place to do it. I do want to entertain more than anything I think. I will figure it out. I’m thinking about it a lot and researching other blogs and just other sites in general to see what kind of direction I’d like to go. I just need structure I think as much as anything and it needs to make me happy. I think when that happens, then it will make others happy. I really appreciate your input more than you know.

      July 6, 2012 at 10:16 pm

      • So here’s my thoughts. I visited your blog because you posted a well-written opinion to my guest author’s post. So you have some writing skills.
        The part about Facebook is hilarious. So you have a sense of humor.
        You’ve been so honest. So that means you’re authentic.
        I respectfully disagree with GOM in Oklahoma. It is a waste of time to make up a bunch of “crap” and then write about it–that doesn’t even make for good fiction. You can be discreet in writing about yourself but you’ve got to be real.
        If revisiting the past is too painful, then begin to write about something that currently brings you joy.
        If you’re not confident about your post, run it past a friend who will give you an objective opinion.
        Subscribe to The Daily Post from WordPress. They have all kinds of writing tips.
        Lastly, I think you need to listen to Amelia.
        Thanks again for your visit and thoughtful comment.

        July 6, 2012 at 11:04 pm

      • Thank you so much for your input Alexandria. That’s very helpful and I appreciate the compliments. I subscribed to your site because I liked what I read and I’ve been checking out a lot of new blog sites looking for new friends and new ideas and inspirations. I hope you’ll come back and visit.

        By the way, in GOM’s defense, he has a very dry sense of humor and that was just part of it. He’s one of my oldest and dearest friends here and is very good to make me (or anyone else) laugh, especially when he knows I (we) need it. But I do agree with you and I have no desire to make up a bunch of stuff. It would be like telling lies to me and I would start worrying about the eye thing. lol

        July 6, 2012 at 11:24 pm

      • Too funny! Glad you know him. I totally understand the humor now. 🙂

        July 7, 2012 at 3:01 pm

  3. I think you’re well on your way to figuring it out…also ranting is good, it helps let go and clear the mind.

    July 7, 2012 at 4:21 am

  4. Hello.. If you find anything solid.. great.. let me know.. I feel writing is its own reward.. validation is important.. there are always those who will try to make money on something not theirs.. there are always those
    for whom truth is an anomaly never to be realized.. routing is something folks do for a living those who put a ‘like’ on something they have not read or at least scanned are not of your ilk or reason.. why pursue them.. in self defense? For myself I have a time doing my own feelings and thoughts.. someone else.. if they offer something usable great.. purpose is most important in this life.. esp. for those who care for real.. care for true and what they have to offer.. best to you.. Peace Tony

    July 14, 2012 at 11:21 am

  5. Hi Tony! I just found this comment. Thanks for your input. I hope you are doing well. It’s good to hear from you!

    July 29, 2012 at 9:48 am

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