The Subjects of Posts

Coming back to blogging after this many years is difficult. I used to post …. something almost every day. I spent a while this evening looking through drafts of posts I never finished and there was a wide variety of subjects in them. Some of them weren’t finished because they were subjects that were just too in depth to finish. I would have needed to write an entire book instead of just a blog post. Some of them were too depressing and I had probably upset myself writing as far as I had gotten with them. Some seemed promising and perhaps I just got distracted or tired and never came back to them.

Whatever I do, I have to be careful not to spend too much time sitting here doing this each day. My health has deteriorated and I have to get up and move or I will surely suffer.

I’m also out of practice and my writing sucks. It will take a while to build it back up to something I can feel proud of again. Writing is a skill like anything else that takes work and lots of it. I just have to keep doing these meaningless posts like this for practice.

The Necessity of Writing

I’ve always written in some form or another. It’s almost an addiction for me. If I’m not actually writing, I’m thinking about writing. Everything that goes on needs to be documented as far as I’m concerned. I don’t know why. I don’t know where the obsession comes from but it’s always been there.

I wrote with pen and paper when I was young and would have papers stuck everywhere. I documented happenings, I wrote short stories, I wrote poems and I even wrote what I daydreamed would be famous songs one day.

When the computer came along I thought I died and went to heaven because I was an excellent typist and could type as fast as I could think. I could do some serious writing then and I could even make it look pretty.

I wrote for entertainment back in the day but as life went on and I began to deal with depression and anxiety and such, writing became a necessity, a form of therapy. It has literally saved my life at times.

I suffer with bipolar disorder and at times when I’m in a manic state and something particular is bothering me, I will talk a mile a minute and no one wants to hear it. I unintentionally pushed everyone in my life away from me because of it. My sister used to jokingly call me the battery killer because I would keep her on the phone until her battery died but she would talk to me or actually mostly listen. At some point though she got old and mean and stopped talking to me. I used to cry about it but I stopped letting it bother me. I just write about it now.

I got away from blogging and journaled for several years. I have over seventeen hundred pages written in ten point type in Microsoft Word. There’s stuff in there I definitely wouldn’t want anyone to see and a lot of stuff I would like for someone to read. The only drawback to journaling is it’s lonely.

So I’m back here. I hope that I can find some of my old friends and not be alone here. I found one last night though I don’t know if he’ll be as happy to see me as I was to see him. He’s a grouchy old man after all.

A Hunting We Will Go…

I read until my neck hurt. I started at GOM’s page and started people hopping. I had a lot of friends here at one time but no one, except you GOM seems to have been here in quite a while. I’m glad you’re still here. At least I won’t be completely alone!

Welcome Home

I haven’t been on WordPress in years. My site is still here with all of my old posts, something I’m happy about but a lot of things have changed, both here and with me so this will be a serious learning curve!

I would really like to find some of my old friends but we’ll see if that happens. All I know is I miss writing in a format where people actually read it and posting memes on Facebook doesn’t do anything for me.

So for now I’ll say to myself, welcome home!

My Etsy Site

Yay! I finally got my Etsy site up and running. I only have nine of my hundreds of bracelets on there, but at least I got it started. It’s a lot more work than I would have expected it to be. I really wish sometimes that I was more of a consistent person than I am, but what the hey. I am who I am. I flit from one thing to the next and back to the other on a daily basis. It’s actually quite exhausting. OCD? I don’t know. I just know that today I am working on my Etsy site. Who knows what I might be doing tomorrow. lol

You can check it out if you’d like at:

http://www.etsy.com/shop/JeanysJewels

 

The Stock Market

Most of you know that my brother is a big part of my life. We are both divorced and about five years ago we decided to buy a place together and rebuild our lives. We bought three acres and a used trailer and started work on the place. Shortly into our quest, I was laid off from my job and he was left with the burden. He stepped up to the plate though and kept paying on the property and kept making improvements. He’s a good man. Today, the property is paid for and the trailer has gone from being a piece of junk we paid $2000 for, to a nice place that’s paid for. I can’t tell you what a good feeling it is to know that your home is paid for and that you don’t have to worry about loosing it no matter how bad things get.

I work and pay my own bills here which isn’t much since it’s just the utilities and I am good about controlling them. He stays out on the road working so I basically live alone. We were talking yesterday and he has built up a nice chunk of savings and wants to continue to invest his money. He’s got a lady friend now and is contemplating buying a house with her, something out of the foreclosure market and get it paid for quick like we did with this place and that will give him two homes that are paid for. That’s great. That move will be on him and her.

However, he wants me to start studying because he wants to invest in the stock market and he wants me to do it for him. Now I’m excited. There’s a lot to know about the stock market though. It’s not something you can just jump in to and get anywhere. I do know people that have done really well with it though that I would never have thought were capable of figuring it all out. My ex being one of those. So, if he can do it and a couple of other people that I’ve known can do it, I know I can.

I started last night just going through a couple of the online trading sites like Scott Trade and TD Ameritrade. So far of those two I like TD Ameritrade better. The site tools and education seem much better and the education is what I’m really after right now. I won’t have a ton of money to work with but I will have enough to make it worth my time to start learning what I’m doing.

So, if anyone already trades online and has any pointers or suggestions, I would love to hear from you! It would be nice to have someone to ask my questions to.

 

Shoe Fettish Anyone?

I don’t know how I started looking at shoes yesterday but I did and I ended up looking at these really funky funny shoes and thought it would make a good post. So here are some of the funkiest ones I found!

Look mom! No heels!

I’d hate to get that stuck somewhere!

Those either!

Has anyone seen my dog?

I think I stepped in something…

Has anyone seen my feet?

Hey baby…want to ride in my little red wagon?

I stepped in it deep this time!

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!

Snow heels…you know…you’ve probably got a pair.

Well, she just must have been a bad girl or something.

Last but not least, I had to include the type that went along with this pair. I believe it was funkier than the shoes and I have absolutely no idea what it actually says.

us should be close to the connections 30bn of women’ ice-skates of s in the region. Like nation. but you have want of excellent perception of way to bind collectively them to design. as we make sure that we are elevated in toes outdoors from the crowd? We pick marks funky. but in an elegant sense. The lovers of adore way this he allows since them to seem great.

 

ok, I had to come back and add one more that Kzinti found.

All I can say is OUCH!!!!

 

My Guard Spider?

This little guy or gal is parked right next to my front door. I guess he or she is looking out for me.

Picture Perfect!

Mom was our rock. She was everything to us and always had been. She had been both mom and dad to us all of our lives. Even after she married Clarence, she was still the dad too. He was too kind and softhearted to discipline anyone. It was her we feared. It was her we looked up to. It was her we confided in. Everything revolved around her.

 She was the epitome of beauty. Her five-foot frame had never lost its shapeliness even after giving birth five times. We measured her once playing around and she measured a perfect 36-24-36. Her hair was always in place, yet the style was ever changing. She had, after all been a beautician when she was younger. Now as I watched her wither away I was angry. I never dreamed she would even be sick, let alone suffering with this terrible disease, this cancer. She didn’t deserve this. She had been through enough in her lifetime.

FD did a post on a 1955 show called “A Word to the Wives” and watching it reminded me of mom. A lot of things remind me of mom. I miss her. I’m not trying to get all sappy on you, I just love this picture of her. Most of my memories, most of what I write about her is inspired by this picture and I don’t think I’ve ever had it on the computer before so I wanted to share it with you. This is the only “studio” portrait taken of mom by herself. She was forty one and had given birth to five children when this was taken. She dressed neatly and fixed herself up almost every day…picture perfect, like the women in the show. This picture was taken about 1970 but she was coming of age in the early 50’s when that show was made and that was the way she thought things should be…picture perfect. You can see it in the photo.

There’s a picture taken the same day of my youngest sister. Mom went to have these made because she wanted a picture of my sister. At two years old, her hair was already down to her butt and it was extremely thick and beautiful. Mom, being a beautician, loved it. She spent all morning the day of the picture piling and pinning my sister’s hair on top of her head. It was gorgeous when she was done and my sister was a passive enough child for the hair do to survive getting to the studio to make the pictures. The truth be known, Mom probably added a half a can of hairspray to the mix that helped too.  My sister has the picture of herself so I couldn’t add it.

The reason I got excited was this is an 11″ x 14″ framed picture and I took it out of the frame and took a picture of it with my camera and saved it to the computer. It turned out awesome. So I’m going to do that with a bunch of my family photos. I haven’t had a scanner for a long time and just haven’t thought about using my camera. Duh!

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